People really don’t know what to say on hearing bad news. The reactions to my telling family and friends about my breast cancer diagnosis range from touching to amusing and just plain odd. I thought I’d write about some of the responses today.

One friend called to cheer me up and told me about her own health issues. She concluded with, “Of course, I can’t imagine getting your diagnosis. I haven’t had anything that catastrophic happen to me.” Thanks. I feel better now.

Another friend wanted to analyze my medical condition. Later she sent me an email and parroted some of the things I’ve written in this blog back to me. That was odd.

Much of what’s happened has been beautiful. In all our lives, my brother and I have never exchanged words of endearment. When he learned of my diagnosis he called to tell me that he loves me. My husband said, “When you love your wife, you do everything you can to help her through it.” My mother brought roses and baked me a cake with plums I’d given her from the produce mart.

Some of the emails I’ve received have been eloquent. I’d like to share a few of them:

“I wanted to let you know that you continue to stay on my mind and in my heart. Sometimes I speak my thoughts out loud to you; just know I am sending you constant thoughts of love, care and healing. I hope you can feel my thoughts embrace and hold you with tender love.”
--Cheryl H.

“I am so sad to hear of your recent news. I read every word you posted on your blog. You are an amazing writer and I can’t wait to read your novel when it goes to press. Sophia intrigues me. I was deeply moved this morning reading your story and the courage and tenacity you are exhibiting facing your cancer. I’m rooting for you.”
--Tracey R.

“You are probably saying what so many women think but are afraid to say and I appreciate it so much. With your wonderful gift of writing, you are telling others that it is okay to have those feelings, to cry and to be angry. I have only been able to imagine what someone just hearing that you have breast cancer can be thinking, now I can know and thank you for that. I think your blog will help many. My best thoughts and prayers.”
--Sue O.

Then there was the friend who called to tell me of her double mastectomy. I should keep blogging, she said. It was good that I was reaching out. I asked whether she’d told anyone of her diagnosis. “No,” she said. “People have a tendency to write you off.”

Nobody had better write me off. If they do, I’ll come back and haunt them.